Or maybe it was the time that a student made sexual
innuendos the entire class period - innuendos that I didn’t realize or
understand (yes, I am THAT naïve). In
fact, I had no idea what he was talking about or referring to until I got home
and asked my husband why that student kept saying that word over and over in
class…
You could think that it was the day that the students kept
referencing drugs and I had no clue. Literally. No clue.
Maybe the time my top button of my button down shirt popped
open for only God knows how long (and I was in the front of the class) before a
female student whispering pointed it
out to me? Nope.
As cringe inducing as those moments in my teaching career are,
they were NOT the most
embarrassing.
The most embarrassing moment of my teaching career was the
time I met The Man, The Myth, The Legend: Alex Rodriguez.
Yes. A-Rod. THE Alex Rodriguez of the Yankees baseball club.
Previously of the Texas Rangers. Previously of the Seattle Mariners. The $250 million dollar man. THAT A-Rod.
I met him. Shook his
hand. TWICE.
You see, I had been crushing on Alex Rodriguez since my
early college days when he first burst onto the baseball scene. Being only a year older than me, and the fact
that I was (and still am) an avid sports fan, I paid attention to the single (“eligible”??)
young, good looking, sports figures.
The $275 million helped a bit...
And the piercing blue eyes… The natural tan… The tall athletic build …
So I had drooled after this man, followed his career for
YEARS. YEARS before I got hired to teach at his high school alma mater. By this time I was a happily married woman. The
fact that he was still single went largely unnoticed by me … I mean, I was
happy he was dating a teacher (his priorities were in the right place,
obviously).
My first year teaching there, he dropped by the high school
a few times to visit old teachers, but, much to my disappointment, I never saw
him. Of course, with a few key
questions, the students had figured out my “celebrity crush,” which, naturally,
they found highly entertaining.
So there I was, hugely pregnant with my first baby (at
least, in my mind I was huge. Looking back, I couldn’t have been more than 5 or
6 months along in a pregnancy in which I hardly gained any weight) … So there I
was … FEELING hugely pregnant ... greasy with excess oils in my already oily-prone
skin from excess of hormones (thanks pregnancy), hot (again, thanks pregnancy
hormones) and in the last period of an average school day, when a knock on the door
interrupted the class. Like a scene
from my best dream and worst nightmare, Alex Rodriguez walked in, followed
closely by the Superintendent of the school.
I blushed to a slight shade of deep purple. It was all the students could do to not break
out into laughter. To their credit, they
held it in and acted as cool as 17 year olds who-know-their-teacher- is-freaking-out
could. A-Rod was there to pitch some
basketball tournament he was involved in
at the school for his Foundation. He was stopping in to various classes to encourage the students to come out and play.
He shook my hand, was friendly, extremely polite and pleasant.
And all I could focus on was the fact
that #1. His clothes were mismatched (Canary Yellow pants and a Hot Pink shirt …
I remember thinking: “Well I guess $275 million dollars doesn’t equal fashion
sense”) and #2. He was a LOT taller and broader than I had ever imagined and
#3. His eyes really WERE that shade of blue/green.
I felt faint. I was dizzy.
I started to sweat profusely. (I’m sure it was only the pregnancy hormones)
I kept wondering, on a scale of 1-10 just how unprofessional would it be
to ask if I could get a picture with him?
I probably would have asked for one, except for the fact that my Superintendent was still there,
standing by the door, smiling at her prodigy.
(Because of which, I decided a photo op with my college –era crush just
wasn’t worth my job … a decision I regret to this day)
All told, he was in my class for about 5 minutes. It felt
like 5 hours.
When the door shut as they left, the class literally ERUPTED
in laughter that could have been heard on the moon. I have no doubt A-Rod knew what the deal
was. Of course, I turned an even deeper
shade of purple. I was beyond red. I can
only be thankful that this event occurred in the pre-Smart Phone Era as I am
100% sure my reaction would have ended up on Youtube.
I never saw him in person again. I’m told if I had gone to
the basketball tournament I would have been able to see him, to take pictures, to
possibly regain some of the dignity I had lost during his class visit. But… I didn’t. I didn’t have the nerve to face him again.
A-Rod in the high school glory days |
A-Rod today on the big stage in the Big Apple |
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